I feel so alone.
There are many people who say they love or care about me.
But I can’t feel it.
I can’t believe it.
It’s like I’m numb to love.
And it’s torture.
You know it’s out there but you will never know it.
It’s like having something you desire very much, and you know where it is, or at least you think you do because you know it’s buried in 10 tons of concrete.
Something you’ll never reach.
Something I’ll never reach.
Men in my life couldn’t love me, at least not in a way I could recognize as love.
Maybe I should just stick to having sex. That’s the only “love” I’ve ever actually felt.
That’s why I wish God would just take me home. He is love. There with Him I know I’d feel it.
I just can’t feel it here.